


Hello, Argentina. Goodbye.

by absolutelyjaded



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Canon Compliant, Iwaizumi Hajime in California (Haikyuu!!), Iwaizumi Hajime/Oikawa Tooru Angst, Light Angst, M/M, Pining, Pining Iwaizumi Hajime, Sad Ending, post-canon-ish
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-27
Updated: 2021-02-27
Packaged: 2021-03-18 09:33:37
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,424
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29731857
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/absolutelyjaded/pseuds/absolutelyjaded
Summary: Iwaizumi Hajime is in love with his best friend. Too bad he's thousands of miles away.
Relationships: Iwaizumi Hajime/Oikawa Tooru
Comments: 2
Kudos: 10





	Hello, Argentina. Goodbye.

**Author's Note:**

> I made this while I was high on caffeine so please excuse any errors! I would also appreciate your feedback <33

Hajime laid on his single bed with his arm across his forehead, staring at the nothingness of the ceiling. It was chilly despite it being a Monday night in May. He wasn’t used to the cold anymore, and the dry California weather made him appreciate the chill just a little. He laid there motionless as if drained of all energy, and he felt like it, too. His mind, which was just running a million thoughts per minute a few moments ago, is now devoid of any thoughts.

The place he’s renting provided him the silence he needed to focus on with his academics, — with the exception of a few college kids having drinks two doors over on a Monday night — and it was pretty much all he could ask for from his parents. They weren’t extraordinarily wealthy but they manage enough to send him to college in California. At first, he offered that he stay in a dormitory on campus because it is relatively cheaper than renting a 1-bedroom apartment, but his parents argued that he’d need his own space. He was thankful for that point because he got to have his friends over when they visited him. Some nights when he’s making dinner, or when he’s reading his anatomy books, he wonders how his friends are doing back in Miyagi. He still misses them at times, but it’s been over two years since he left town that it doesn’t make his heart ache when he thinks of home anymore. Besides, he’s so accustomed to the culture in California already that he’s learned to embrace this new life he had with an open heart.

He had an internship at a gym near campus as an assistant to a coach there. He’s met a couple of friends who recommended him the job, and he was glad because it gave him enough to do on the moments he was lonely. It’s also a treat that he gets to meet so many new people who share the same interests as him and though he didn’t use to be so sociable when he got to California, he thought it wasn’t so bad after being welcomed as the token Japanese hottie in his friend group. Hajime was grateful, in a way, for the new life he had.

The sound of boiling water shrieking from the pot urged him to snap out of his stupor. He couldn’t shake the grogginess from his body as he stood up ever so slowly to turn the fire off. A coffee maker was on the top of his list of things to buy, but something always puts it off. A few months ago, it was the Coachella ticket he was pressured to buy because of his friends, and the month before that, he needed new AirPods because his last pair got lost in the gym; and so he has to settle for pot-boiled water for now.

Hajime was so tired but he has a paper to finish by tonight, and so he passes the hot water through the coffee filter ever so lazily as he sat down in front of his study desk. He hasn’t showered, nor has he bothered to change his shirt. His mother always told him to shower immediately whenever he gets home, but tonight he couldn’t be bothered. Actually, if his mother knew a couple of the things he’d been up to, he would’ve definitely gotten more than a scolding by now. Before leaving Hajime alone in California, they told him the standard going-away-to-college package, that is: no drugs, no sex, no dirty apartment. He had promised them, yes, of course, he wouldn’t do any of those things. He came here to study, he added, but he’s afraid that he has neither promise left unbroken now.

The parties were too good to pass up during his freshman year. He decided he’d try everything, because why the fuck wouldn’t he? He got flat-out wasted, tried puffing a joint, and had people dirty up his apartment. He’s had his fair share of hookups, too, all when he was drunk, though. He has never sacrificed his academics and remained a dean’s lister every semester despite being at a party almost every week. His parents would have flown him back home had they known he does all of these things, but they trust him enough to know that Hajime is aware of his own limits and the discipline he has for himself is grounded in his ambition. He would never sacrifice his ambition.

He skimmed through his textbook, taking notes on the information he needs for his paper. He’s always been focused and determined (there aren’t a lot of times when he isn’t, to be honest), especially when he puts his mind to it. The calm silence that now envelopes his room was a welcome along with the breeze from the open balcony. It was a perfect night to walk around the neighborhood, too. Somehow, though, he isn’t quite feeling like himself tonight.

Earlier right after his last afternoon class, — a draining 1.5-hour Physiology lecture— he finds himself sitting on a bench near the building where his friends were, waiting for the rest of them to finish their classes so they can all get dinner together (it was an unspoken rule that they had to have dinner together). He bought himself some freshly squeezed orange juice because he learned that it was good for his heart’s health, and watched the people as they walked by. He knows that he’s pretty popular around campus,— there were a shit ton of people who stopped by to say hi to him as he sat there, — but he never let it get to his head. He never really understood why people were so drawn to him. Maybe they find his accent a little funny? Though that wouldn’t explain the number of people constantly complimenting his voice. He gets told that he’s attractive quite a lot by his friends and other people from school, and he wonders why that is so as he took his phone out of his pocket. Scrolling through his notifications, he sees 20+ new likes on his latest post-workout photo on Instagram and the same amount of comments from people he knew in California. Along with the heap of Instagram notifications and a couple of memes sent by Matsukawa, he finds four new messages from a familiar name.

Oikawa’s living in Argentina now. He jetted off right after graduation so fast that they didn’t get to spend their last summer together right before college. Summers to them were a big deal because they get to play all the volleyball they want, spending their days lounging around being the boys that they were. Hajime only has fond memories of Oikawa: of him when they were 8, having their first sleepover at the Iwaizumi residence; of him in his captain’s uniform, playing at the inter-high preliminaries; of him and the heady look in his eyes as he told Hajime that he was his best friend, face merely an inch away from his face, high off of the liquor they snuck into Hajime's bedroom that one summer night. Hajime knew how to read between the lines. He knew what Oikawa meant. He wanted to tell him, you’re my best friend, too. He wanted to succumb to the electricity bridging his lips to those luscious ones so bad. He’d been dreaming about this for so long, after all, but he froze in his spot on the floor. Eyes wide and lips parted, waiting on bated breath for Oikawa to finally make the move. Neither one of them said anything for a moment, then, like a soft tingle in all the right places, Oikawa touched his lips on Hajime’s for the first time. Hajime sat rooted in place, unable to do anything but purse his lips against Oikawa’s. It was experimental, neither one of them had kissed another person before, and even though they were both drunk, at this moment they both knew what they were doing. He felt the tips of Oikawa’s fingers on his neck as he leaned towards him more, and the warmth that gushed throughout his body gave him the energy and passion he didn’t know he had. He stroked his lips at a fervent passion against Oikawa’s and soon found himself straddling the dark brown-haired boy on his bedroom floor. He had instinctively ground his hips on Oikawa’s parted legs and felt the evidence that they were both as aroused as the other.

It had come to an end when Hajime pulled away and saw the lust in Oikawa’s eyes. He had never seen this side of him before, — so erotic yet so pure — and he wanted to do more, so much more, but he knew they had to end it here. He was afraid, in a way, because he didn’t know how to do this right, that they might hurt one another. Oikawa was quick to learn that they both weren’t ready to do this yet and took Hajime’s cheeks in his hands, giving him a soft peck on the lips. Right after that one drunken yet epiphanic night, they swore to remain best friends. At that moment when everything felt so right, it felt like finally coming home after years of searching for one, and it dawned on Hajime as clear as day that he was in love with his best friend. Perhaps, even, he’s loved him all this time.

After Hajime drew a close from Oikawa that night, they stayed up talking about their plans for the future. They were third years that year, which meant that college applications were just around the corner. They were heavy-hearted at the thought of saying their valedictions to each other so soon and losing at the Spring High preliminaries certainly sucked. In all their years they never got the team to play at Nationals. Yet, they were antsy for what was to come after graduation. “I’m leaving,” Oikawa muttered softly, staring at the tips of the sunrise peering into Hajime’s window. “Might train under Blanco in Argentina,” Hajime was sure Oikawa was ambitious more than anything, but his determination will get him anywhere, and that he was sure of. He knew Oikawa will make it big someday, he just wished he could be there to see it all unfold with him.

They did stay best friends after that, and even with the occasional yearning glances they send each other, they never kissed again. It was best to keep being friends. After all, Hajime’s acceptance letter from UC Irvine just arrived, and soon enough they’ll be worlds apart. Neither one of them was brave enough to enact their will, but perhaps they were just being considerate and understanding of one another’s ambition. They both knew that the other was meant for great things.

Hajime tapped on the notification from Oikawa and looked around the place to see if any of his friends are coming, so far he hasn’t seen anyone he knows. They remained in contact throughout the years and updated each other on their lives every now and then and he was glad that their friendship didn’t wane despite the distance. He looks at the messages. First, it was a picture of the sun setting on the shore. Oikawa was probably running when he stopped to take this picture, he thought. The messages were sent hours ago but Argentina was five hours away from where he was so Oikawa was probably at home getting ready to sleep now.

 **Oikawa:** The sunset here looks so pretty!  
 **Oikawa:** Iwa-chan, can we talk? I know you’re in class right now but please call me when you see this!  
 **Oikawa:** Call me, okay? I have something really important to tell you. *alien emoji*

It wasn’t uncommon for Oikawa to message Hajime so urgent-sounding. He always had something to say whether it be a new restaurant he found or an update on one of their favorite teams. He always dramatically stated things. He quickly typed in a response,

 **Iwaizumi:** Class just ended! Going out for dinner in a bit. Call you later?

He considered taking a selfie for him to send to Oikawa for a moment, and before he knew it he was grinning in front of the camera, hitting send without even looking at the photo. He put his phone back in his pocket and forgot about it. He was eating at a taco joint that his friends wanted to try out when he felt the buzz of a new notification from his pocket, but he decided to check it later. Soon after he parted with his friends for the night (they live in the dorms), he felt the tingle of the cool breeze on his cheeks, very much like how it felt when he was walking home back in high school, which reminds him of the notification earlier. As he suspected, it was Oikawa. That idiot, he thought, it’s hours past midnight from where he is. His message read,

 **Oikawa:** Iwa-chan you take the WORST selfies… stick to your thirst traps, please.  
 **Oikawa:** Anyway, I couldn’t sleep haha, so just… call me when you’re free.

He was near his apartment complex now, but the place was quiet enough that he decided to call Oikawa right then and there. He found a spot under a streetlight and just as he was about to sit down, he hears Oikawa’s voice from the speakers of his phone. They hadn’t called each other in a while, and he suspects that this will be a long one because if he knew Oikawa, he knows that he likes to talk. Oikawa’s giddy voice rang through and it made Hajime smile, hello to you, too. It was nice listening to him talk about his practices with Blanco and the team he’s on right now. It brings so much joy to Hajime to know that his best friend is thriving and living his dream. He stayed worried for a little too long before leaving for California about drifting apart when they’re not together anymore, but he realized that they’re never drifting apart. They were partners for life.

“You remember the guy I was telling you about?” Oikawa asked timidly, as if he wanted to shout it out in excitement but managed to control himself in time. Hajime remembers, of course. He’s not one to forget about the people Oikawa surrounds himself with, in fact, he knows the guy quite well. “Your teammate’s brother, yeah?” Hajime responded. He liked to believe he sounded calm, but his mind was running a million miles a minute. This guy started appearing in a lot of the photos Oikawa uploads on Instagram. He knew from Oikawa’s stories that they were really close friends and that they hang out a lot, but a couple of weeks back, Oikawa mentioned that the guy had confessed his feelings for him. Hajime didn’t know what to feel, if he were to be honest, when his best friend told him that. Deep inside, he wanted to keep Oikawa to himself. He wanted to tell him, wait for me, I’m gonna make it big someday, just wait for me, but like that night when they were 17, he was afraid again.

Tonight, as he sat under the streetlight, his heart felt heavy as he listened to Oikawa say that, yes, he has a boyfriend now, and that he’s so happy that he’s been treating him so well. He didn’t reciprocate the feelings when the guy confessed at first, but tonight he wanted to tell Hajime that he has finally entered his first relationship with a guy who truly understands his needs and that he was so, so happy. He didn’t know who else to tell first but his best friend in the whole world, of course. Hajime deserved to be the first one to know. He listened to his best friend excitingly relay the details that commenced to him finally accepting his new boyfriend’s relationship proposal with a broken-hearted smile. The shame he felt with the way his first emotions weren’t cheerful enough for his best friend cast a tumultuous pain in him. He sucked in a pained breath and closed his eyes to prevent the tears from falling. If he were to talk right now, it would’ve felt like chucking an elephant down his throat. His heart was a grueling mess, but he managed to croak out affirmatives to Oikawa who was blissfully, softly, muttering Hajime’s name.

“Hajime,” he paused. “Please tell me you’re happy for me,”

Hajime took in a deep sigh, pulled his head out from the hole he was spiraling in, and said with the confidence he pulled out of nowhere, “Of course, shittykawa, you deserve the best. I’m so happy for you,”

“Thank you, Iwa-chan. I just wanted to tell you first. Anyway, it should be nearing midnight there, no? Aren’t you sleepy?” He could say the same to him, considering it was almost sunrise where he’s at, but he just chuckled and said yeah, he is sleepy. He told him that he still had to look for a new internship tomorrow because his current one’s going to end soon, and Oikawa wished him luck and promised that he’ll call with updates. Hajime couldn’t do anything but smile, a real yet wounded one. “Yeah, yeah. Goodbye. Don’t stress out your boyfriend too much,” he joked. When they ended the call, he just sat there by the road gutter under the streetlight, eyes forlorn and heart heavy. It took him a while to pick himself up, but he eventually ended up dragging his empty vessel back to his apartment.

He finds himself sitting in front of his desk smelling a little bit like tacos while trying to read his textbook, but he couldn’t. He couldn’t shake off the regret he felt for not acting sooner. He wants to be happy for Oikawa so bad but he feels shameful for wishing it was him he was calling his boyfriend instead. He knows they’ve both been experimenting with other people when they parted ways, but deep inside he just knew they’d always come back to each other. They were forever each other’s partners ever since they were children. He wanted to let Oikawa know so, so bad. Heck, he’s already booked a plane ticket to surprise Oikawa on his birthday and already drafted a plan on how he was going to confess. He wanted to see him, wanted to confess to him in person, wanted to touch those lips again… but he’s just a little too late. He felt empty as he tried to smooth out the frown he was making. Hajime's eyes couldn't read the text anymore because of the tears that were threatening to spill on his cheeks, and so he let them spill in jagged breath and gave up the pretense.

Oikawa is happy and Hajime knows Oikawa can’t be bothered to receive a goddamn confession from his best friend, especially right after telling him that he was finally in a relationship. Oikawa has spent so much time going on dates with other people, looking for a partner, and Hajime knew that Oikawa was ready for a relationship. So why didn’t he make a move? Why hadn’t he come to Argentina sooner to tell him how he feels? Hajime has never felt regret like this before. Though, in his defense, he had almost told him on the way home after losing in the Spring High preliminaries. They were both emotional due to the fact that they’ve never tasted nationals together, nor will they ever, but Oikawa’s face looked so raw and the passion that burned in his eyes almost made Hajime doubt the fieriness of the sun. The urge that he felt to kiss the lips from which his beloved’s tears ran over was almost strong enough to make him pull the boy’s face towards his. To feel the lightness of his ethereal touch, to take in the scent that could only belong to Oikawa, and to marvel at the love he felt for the one he yearned for the most; that’s all he ever wanted. That’s all he ever wants.

But as he stared at the coffee cup in his hands, eyes red and heartbroken, he had thought of finally getting that coffee maker on his list. Tomorrow, he said, he’ll process the refund of his plane ticket to Buenos Aires, saying goodbye before he even got to say hello.


End file.
